Originally posted on July 6, 2023.

What? A Party at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave?

A Total Mystery

The New York Post reported Tuesday morning that a substance found in the White House’s West Wing this weekend tested positive for cocaine. Cockburn, who won’t complain about this massive win for federal drug legalization, “only wants to know who would leave such an expensive substance at the White House.”

Cockburn, ever prescient, reports in Spectator on what secret service agents found: a white “cocaine-like” powder while the SS were deploying a routine round of the White House. President Joe Biden and his family were ensconced at Camp David when fire and emergency crews were called in to investigate. Fortunately, the family wasn’t involved in the roundup when the West Wing was evacuated.

From a DC firefighter in a radio communication at 8:49 Sunday:

“We have a yellow bar stating cocaine hydrochloride. Bag it up and take it out.” 

Cockburn regrets that cryptic info coming from the White House is doing nothing to help Cockburn whittle down the list of possible culprits.

The only events held at the White House last week were press briefings, and while he wouldn’t put it past those jumped-up journos to self-medicate after the Supreme Court’s decisions, there is no evidence connecting any one person to the discovery at present. But who could possibly smuggle a Schedule II narcotic into the White House past K-9 units or pass security clearance dependent on being clean?

Who Could It Have Been?

Newsweek reports:

The younger Biden was seen at the White House on Friday before leaving for Camp David.

Although there is no material evidence to peg Hunter, when you have a prolific history of illicit drug use, unburdens Cockburn, a few fingers may start to point.